rossendaleharriers.myfreeforum.org

Norman Bates · Joined: 21 May 2008 Posts: 7

Apart from my other activities I just love to log onto these forums to see just what is going on in the real world. Some of the usernames though seem a bit strange to me and I suspect that some of them are made up. Not me though I like to use my real name whatever the consequences, only last Thursday though a man in a blazer and a big badge came up to me and said, "Norman, we dont like what you are writing on our forum and if you dont stop it off straight away we will turn the water off to your shower, block up your peephole and take away your mothers rocking chair ".....well that wont do I thought, how then would I get my jollies ?..maybe go off and enter some road race or other but then how would I get my name in the paper or get a mention at the brief !
Anyway must go Ive got the breadknife to sharpen and a shower curtain to wash before the arrival of the next fellrunner.......yes mother I will be there in a minute........Norman c/o Bates Motel

Unlucky Alf · Joined: 12 May 2008 Posts: 13

Well Norman you seem to be a man after my own heart as I too have no time for pseudonyms. However my advice would be to steer clear of the roads as all that tarmac could leave you bitter and twisted. Stick to what you know best such as tending your motel and looking after those nice fell runners.

dnf · Joined: 11 Mar 2008 Posts: 123

Proper fellrunners use tents not motels Norman. My name aint made up, you will see it at the end of most race results.
You can get a 'forever sharp' breadknife on the Price-drop channel by the way.

disco stan · Joined: 20 Oct 2007 Posts: 79 Location: Waterfoot

Come on Greg own up, we don't need rooms just tents not like you soft lads.

Norman Bates · Joined: 21 May 2008 Posts: 7

Well now Alf you sound to be a man after after my own heart.You should come and stay with us.You could have the room right next to my little office where I can keep my eye on you. Mother would like you, she is a crusty old devil these days but she is a sucker for a strange face (yours will suffice) and I am sure you would like her too. She has been a bit quiet of late but I am sure your visit should perk her up. She doesnt like my running of course thinks I should take up something worthwhile like triple jumping but I have told her that its too complicated for me and I cant stand all of that sand betwwen my little pinkies. All of that hop skipping and jumping should be left to the likes of Australian Marsupials.Well must go, its time for the afternoon matinee and there is a film on there I dont want to miss, must get out for some training later though in preperation for next Mondays jogging club.

Hugh Jarse · Joined: 29 Feb 2008 Posts: 46

Norman Bates · Joined: 21 May 2008 Posts: 7

My problem you see is that being new to this running game I am unsure just which way to turn (so to speak) Should I follow the sheep (I did say follow) and take up fell running or should I risk the wrath of my friends and the run the risk of being shunned by the greater public and call myself a roadie.Whats the difference I ask myself can I not just be runner ?...do I have to choose, should I take up trail running and take the middle road. Business though has been bad recently and my Woolies pumps need replacing, is this form of footwear ok for running the Ben.....should be ok for the Toytown 10 though, should I upgrade to Gola Green Flash pumps ? I overhead someone recently commenting that fell running is full of yuppies and I must admit to having heard what I thought was a southern accent at the recent Gruntfuttock Grind. Is this the kind of sport I want to get involved with......please help........confused fom Milton Keynes.

Unlucky Alf · Joined: 12 May 2008 Posts: 13

Norman, you seem to be spending too much time in the knife drawer for your own good. You'll end up in trouble with your mother just like that naughty little Hughie. I'll no doubt get chance to speak to her myself when I get time to visit. Don't worry about your pumps though, as the other famous Alf (Mr Tupper) ran on all surfaces with just the same footwear and my other mate Wilson, now he was a classic, hardly ever wore shoes at all.

dnf · Joined: 11 Mar 2008 Posts: 123

Dear confused from Milton Keynes, the southern voice you heard at the Grind was probably you talking to yourself............God,.....I was hopeing this road v fell spat would 'die a death' after we'd all kissed and made up.
Perhaps a wheelchair race might be an option ? Seriously though, go out with Hugh and Rod on the roads, if you don't suit then out with me and Stan on the fells.......................yes...............I know a nice little spot on Saddleworth Moor...................6ft+2ft.......................

Mrs Bates · Joined: 23 May 2008 Posts: 2

I see Master Bates has been up to his usual mischief, he just won't do what is mummy tells him.